Hands-on help

Heidi Yang

Heidi Yang, my personal and business assistant, as well as my friend and champion, has been (and continues to be) my irreplaceable partner in the development of my ideas, my coaching approaches, and the dissemination of my ideas. Not only has she provided me with deep listening and perspicacious feedback on my developing ideas about this site, she's provided valued input on design decisions (yes, we both know our site has that home-grown flavor), along with eagle-eyed editing.


Even more hands-on, she's responsible for creating and maintaining mobile-friendly access to this site. She's also my videographer. Almost all videos on this site were recorded and edited by Heidi.

She's working with me closely in designing and editing my forth coming book, "Quote-a-Coach: Ideas that make the difference, Quotes to open a thousand doors."

Daniel Patterson

Daniel Patterson, super wiz with HTML, created the code for two quizzes (see How much better could your life be? and What is your courage IQ?). He's also responsible for the 14:24 timer in the header bar. His email.

Trish Coffey

As co-author of "Courage: the Choice that Makes the Difference-Your Key to a Thousands Doors," Trish has been an ongoing collaborator (since 2001), especially regarding the issue of courage. For this site, she specifically composed the answers to the Courage IQ test. Trish being there as my support and champion has made me who I am today and what AskDwightHow is becoming. Her email.

Kaitlin Xian

Co-performer with me of "Please vote me the victim."

Sophie Zheng

Sophie created the design feel for the home page. Contact me if you would like an introduction.

Wix and the support staff at Wix

As a newbie, launching this site near the beginning of 2018, I was justifiably nervous about choosing a platform to develop AskDwightHow on. It's a bit like getting married, at least in this case, since it would be costly to change platforms as my site got more robust. All my concerns were unjustified. Wix.com continues to surprise me with its ease of use and versatility (especially since I wanted to do most of the hands-on work myself). And, wow! Their support staff is quick-on-the-draw to respond promptly to my email queries about this or that. 

Consulting help

Leslie Carruthers, a marketing sleuth, patiently helped me see past my own "curse of knowledge" cognitive bias with AskDwightHow.

Walk throughs: the following have done "walk throughs" and reviews with me on various portions of AskDwightHow, generously providing invaluable feedback.

  • Alex Patterson

  • Amy Zhu

  • Anne Wayman

  • Bud Hazelkorn

  • Frank Jorgensen

  • Heber LeBaron

  • Jeff Newman

  • Jim Burk

  • Karen Tonisson

  • Kat Udarro

  • Maya Meng

  • Paul Lancaster

  • Phil Blackmon

  • Sam Sonnie

AskDwightHow users: among others, the following helped make this site more valuable:

  • David Wheeler (Dr.)

  • Dominik Lee

  • Frank Jorgensen

  • Jim Lockhart

  • John Stob

  • Maria Hu

  • Michael Wang

  • Mike Akagi

  • Rich Smith

  • Rocky Jiang

People who made me

These people (all of whom I personally know or have known) have been significant in affecting my personal growth that today allows me to have both the inspiration and ability to create AskDwightHow.


Dorothy Alice Minkler (my mother). We don’t get to pick our parents. Destiny made a better choice for who would be my mother than I could have made myself.


Jackson Dwight Minkler (my father). Because, when growing up, I didn’t understand my father and I blamed him, our relationship provided me with the fertile ground to dig deeper into myself and to learn to love and appreciate him.

Karen Adele Tonisson (my sister). Just talking, sharing, and exchanging ideas together throughout the journey of our lives.


Ruth Wolfert (Gestalt counselor). She helped me to uncover the world below my conscious thoughts (working with her for a few years, starting when I was 26 years old).


Louise VanBuskirk (my first wife). We researched together the world of romantic relationships. She also supported me in changing my career in April of 1987 from a computer software consultant to a life and lifestyle couch.


Yuko Nagai (my second wife). She provided on-the-job training for me to learn how to create and maintain good relationship boundaries.


Trish Coffey (coauthor of my book on courage). Trish has been a valued friend and bouncing-ideas-around partner since the year 2000.

Apologies to hundreds of others who have made a direct difference in my life, but are not mentioned above.

Trainings that made me

If I have seen further than others,

it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.
-Isaac Newton

  • Courses of Ayn Rand's Objectivist philosophy (given by the the Nathaniel Branden Institute)

  • Dr. Nathaniel Branden (Biocentric Psychology workshops and weekend intensives)

  • Maharishi Mahesh Yogi (Transcendental Meditation trainings and retreats)

  • Werner Erhard and Landmark Education (est training, The Forum, and others)

  • Dr. John Grinder and Richard Bandler (NLP)

  • Tony Robbins (Date with Destiny)

  • Fernando Flores (language distinctions)

  • Harry Palmer (The Avatar Course)

  • George Adair (Omega workshops)

  • Byron Katie (School for the Work)

Books that made me

The first books that made me were read to me by my mother

Usually, my mother would lie in the middle of the bed, propped up on her elbows, with my sister lying on one side and me on the other. She would read to us for up to an hour at a time. Here are some of the books/stories that I remember her reading.

  • Articles and condensed books from the Readers Digest

  • "Just So Stories" by Rudyard Kipling, like "How the Leopard got his Spots"

  • "Old Yellar" by Fred Gipson

  • "Little Men" and "Little Women" by Louisa May Alcott

  • "Black Beauty" by Anna Sewell

  • "Heidi" by Johana Spyri

  • "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" by Mark Twain

  • "Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves" and other "The Arabian Nights" stories (anonymous)

  • One book/story really impressed me (can't find the title). In the story, the father becomes insane and needs an operation to cure him. The struggle of the poor family to make that happen (maybe I was so impressed because my father was bipolar, even though I didn't consciously know it yet)

Notes (books to include)

Return of the Native (Thomas Hardy)

Whole Earth Catalog

Ayn Rand's books and objectivist newsletter

Playboy Philosophy

Male Sexuality and Female Sexuality

Race and Reason

Black Like Me

Masters of Deceit

When I Say No, I Feel Guilty

Websites: Examine, NutritionFacts

Movies that made me

  • “500 Days of Summer” with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Zooey Deschanel

  • “A Few Good Men” with Jack Nicholson and Tom Cruise

  • “American Beauty” with Kevin Spacey and Mena Suvari

  • “As Good As It Gets” with Jack Nicholson and Greg Kinnear

  • “Babel” with Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett

  • “Being There” with Peter Sellers and Shirley MacLaine

  • “Bridges of Madison County” with Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep (the only movie that makes me cry, almost every time I watch it)

  • “Casablanca” with Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman

  • “Chocolat” with Juliette Binoche and Johnny Depp

  • “Crimson Tide” with Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington

  • “Dangerous Beauty” with Catherine McCormack and Rufus Sewell

  • “Devil’s Advocate” with Al Pacino and Keanu Reeves

  • “Die Hard” with Bruce Willis and Alan Rickman

  • “Dinner with Andre” with Andre Gregory and Wallace Shawn (the most “deep thinking” movie I ever saw)

  • “Disclosure” with Michael Douglas and Demi Moore

  • “Dr. No” with Sean Connery

  • “Fargo” with Frances McDormand and William Macy

  • “Flipped” with Madeline Carrol and Callan McAuliffe

  • “For Whom the Bells Toll” with Gary Cooper and Ingrid Bergman

  • “Forrest Gump” with Tom Hanks and Sally Field

  • “Fried Green Tomatoes” with Mary Stuart Masterson and Kathy Bates

  • “Ghost” with Patrick Swayze and Whoopi Goldberg

  • “Goldfinger” with Sean Connery

  • “Gone with the Wind” Vivien Leigh and Clark Gable

  • “Grease” with John Travolty and Olivia Newton-John

  • “Harold and Maude” with Ruth Gordon and Bud Cort

  • “Jerry MaGuire” with Tom Cruise and Renee Zellweger

  • “Liar Liar” with Jim Carrey and Audrey Reede

  • “Life is Beautiful” with Roberto Benigni

  • “Little Children” with Kate Winslet and Patrick Wilson

  • “Little Miss Sunshine” with Greg Kinnear and Abigail Breslin

  • “Love, Actually” with Hugh Grant and Liam Neeson

  • “Meet Joe Black” with Anthony Hopkins and Brad Pitt

  • “Men in Black” with Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith

  • “Mrs. Doubtfire” with Robin Williams and Lisa Jakub

  • “My Best Friend’s Wedding” with Julia Roberts and Cameron Diaz

  • “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” with Nia Vardolas and John Corbett

  • “Peacemaker” with George Clooney and Nicole Kidman

  • “Play It Again, Sam” with Woody Allen and Diane Keaton

  • “Pleasantville” with Reese Witherspoon and Tobey Maguire

  • “Pretty Woman” with Julia Roberts and Richard Gere

  • “Primal Fear” with Richard Gere and Edward Norton

  • “Sabrina” with Harrison Ford and Julia Ormond

  • “Scent of a Woman” with Al Pacino and Chris O’Donnell

  • “Sense and Sensibilities” with Kate Winslet and Emma Thompson

  • “Singin’ in the Rain” with Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds

  • “Six Days Seven Nights” with Harrison Ford and Anne Heche

  • “Sleepless in Seattle” with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan

  • “Something’s Gotta Give” with Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton

  • “Summer of 42” with Jennifer O’Neill and Gary Grimes

  • “The Dead Poet Society” with Robin Williams and Ethan Hawke

  • “The General” with Buster Keaton

  • “The Gods Must be Crazy” with N!xau Toma and Jamie Uys

  • “The Negotiator” with Samuel L. Jackson and Kevin Spacey

  • “The Parent Trap” with Hayley Mills

  • “The Prince of Tides” with Nick Nolte and Barbara Streisand

  • “The Rock” with Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage

  • “The Seven Year Itch” with Marilyn Monroe and Tom Ewell

  • “The Truman Show” with Jim Carrey and Ed Harris

  • “The Unbearable Lightness of Being” with Daniel Day-Lewis and Juliette Binoche

  • “True Lies” with Arnold Schwarenegger and Jamie Lee Curtis

  • “Under Siege” with Steven Seagal and Tommy Lee Jones

  • “When Harry Met Sally” with Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan

  • “White House Down” with Channing Tatum and Joey King

Music that makes me

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