The toxicity in questions​

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Many of my friends have asked me the question, "Why did you leave China?"

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We may have the answers but the questions have us. Very few of us have the habit of questioning our questions. 

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A much better question would be, "What benefits and costs were important to you in deciding to move from Kunming, China to Medellin, Colombia?" 

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I'll answer that question in a minute. But first let's look at the problems with the original question, "Why did you leave China?"

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Cognitive biases

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Implied within the question, "Why did you leave China?" several cognitive biases have taken up residence.

 

• Righteousness bias

• Sunk cost bias and loss aversion bias

• Commitment bias and the persistence bias

• Plan continuation bias

• Status quo bias

• Hyperbolic discounting, present bias, and short-term bias

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Righteousness bias

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The question implies that there was something wrong with China or with my living there. The question lives inside the HOGAB and makes an open-eyed assessment of costs and benefits, risks and possibilities problematic.

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Sunk cost bias and loss aversion bias

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The question focuses us on what we would lose by giving up what we have instead of what we could or would gain by making a change.

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Commitment bias and persistence bias

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The question lives inside the assumption that continuing with and being persistent in our past commitment is the right thing to do.

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Plan continuation bias

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Similar to the commitment bias is the plan continuation bias. You planned to stay in Kunming. Therefore you should continue with your plan.

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Status quo bias

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The way things are is better than changing things. "Just leave well enough alone," as the saying goes.

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Hyperbolic discounting, present bias, and short-term bias

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In the short run, I incurred (and am still incurring) many costs by moving. If I was just looking weeks or a few months ahead, then moving to Colombia would not make sense. It's only by considering the big, longer-term picture, that the choice was obvious to me.

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What benefits and costs were important to you in deciding to move from Kunming, China to Medellin, Colombia?

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Now to answer the "same" question without the cognitive biases embedded.

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Because Medellin and Colombia is a better city and country for me than Kunming and China.

 

Pros (Medellin, Colombia is better than Kunming, China)

 

• Better weather all year around: 62 F (17 C) to 78 F (26 C) degrees compared to 36 F (2 C) to 75 F (24 C)

• Somewhat cheaper in housing and much cheaper in labor (for my personal assistant and housekeeper)

• Easier to get girlfriend(s): 21-year-old girls and their family/friends think nothing of them having a 78-year-old boyfriend

• More neighborly (Chinese are friendly and helpful, but not as neighborly)

• Much easier to get a permanent visa and residency

• No VPN needed: I love easily using Whatsapp

• Colombia has a better relationship with the USA and is not about to go to war with anybody

• Certain drugs (like modafinil) are much easier to get

• A language that is fun and easy for me to learn

• Better medical system

• Relatively easy-going regarding COVID

• Although this may wear off over the years as it did somewhat with living in Asia for over 22 years, Colombian people, Colombia, and South America provide a dramatically different playground for me to explore.

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Cons (Kunming, China is better than Medellin, Colombia)

 

• Not as physically safe from thieves and thugs

• Not as much access to a variety of super great deals in online shopping and restaurant home delivery

• Food in restaurants not as inexpensive and not as healthy as in Kunming

• Must wait longer for things to get done (it’s a manana culture)

• Colombian kids are not as cute to me as Chinese kids are (and I must ask permission to take photos)

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