My Destiny

When did they know?

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When and to what extent did Jesus Christ, Buddha, and Muhammad know that their destiny was to bring a fresh idea of how to live a good life to all their fellow human beings?

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Late bloomer

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Well, I must be the turtle. By my age (currently 77), Jesus and Muhammad were already dead, and Buddha was nearing his reputed 80 years.

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Slowly and reluctantly it dawned on me

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It hasn't been that many years ago since I started to face the inexorable truth. For example, it was on December 8th, 2018 that I composed and started declaring to myself daily about being "The One" to bring the New Ethics of Integrity to the world. This is my first time (January 16, 2022) to declare this as my destiny publicly and explicitly on AskDwightHow.

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This is my destiny

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We've needed a viable replacement for the Old Ethics of Sacrifice that's been dominant and recycled for all of humanity since beginning of recorded history. This old ethics, in promoting the idea of sacrifice as "the good," has left almost all of us, no matter how successful our lives, with a messy internal civil war where life often occurs as hard, unfair, scary, boring, meaningless, feeling like we're not good enough, and inauthentic.

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The civil wars simmer and rage on four fronts

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The Now-Next conflicts: The Old Ethics teaches us to put our Next (having a good future) ahead of our Now (feeling good now).

The Old Ethics lionizes

• never procrastinating

• persistence

• constancy

• reliability

• hard work

• "more pain, more gain"

• delaying and sacrificing feeling good now in exchange for a future reward or possibility.

The Old Ethics villainizes

• laziness

• addictions

• procrastination

• get distracted

• giving up

• unreliability

• wastefulness

• self-indulgence in entertainment, sex, food, or drugs.

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With the Old Ethics, you always lose

When Next is in conflict with Now, as in "I really should stay on my diet and not have that ice cream," and Next "wins," meaning Now tolerates not getting what he or she wants, then you lose because your Now lost.

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In contrast, if Now "wins" and Next loses, Next will likely blame Now, as well as Next getting discouraged about his or her future. You lose this way also. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Either one part of you is unhappy or the other is.

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The Oneself-Others conflicts: The old ethics teaches us to put our Others (concern for others and how we look to others) ahead of our Oneself (our need and desire to take care of ourselves and to be self-expressed and authentic).

The Old Ethics lionizes

• unselfishness

• kindness

• generosity and giving to others

• sharing

• reliability

• loyalty

• punctuality

• keeping one's word

• honesty

• duty and responsibility

• obedience

• compassion

• being a giver

• law-abiding

• patriotism

• looking good to others, having a good reputation

• feeling guilty when you do something wrong

• humbleness

• self-sacrificing

• team player

• working for the greater good

• treating others with fairness.

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The Old Ethics villainizes

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• selfishness

• greediness

• envy

• being a taker

• being a slut or a playboy

• being a prostitute

• illegal aliens

• human smugglers

• smugglers

• being of welfare

• being impolite

• cheating others

• abandoning others

• molesters, rapists

• thieves, murderers

• complainers

• liars or those who are dishonest

• womanizers, seducers

• gold diggers

• being prejudiced

• flirts

• being spoiled

• breaking your agreements

• not keeping your agreements

• not being punctual

• shirking responsibility and duties

• unpatriotic

• disloyalty

• not paying back what is owed

• showing off

• being cold-hearted

• narcissistic, conceited, egotistical, or self-centered

• miserly or tight-fisted

• corrupt 

• not feeling guilty for doing something wrong

• being a criminal

• disobedience

• uncooperative

• AWOL

• not being a team player

• not doing what is expected of them

• domineering

• being shameless

• taking advantage of others

• exploiting others

• not paying back when others sacrificed for you

• being a tax dodger, cheating on your taxes

• breaking the law, skirting regulations, using loopholes in the law

• bribing officials

• forgetful

• exploitive

• insensitive.

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With the Old Ethics, you always lose

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When Others is in conflict with Oneself, as in "I really should lend my brother the money he's asking for and I don't want to," and Others "wins," meaning Oneself sacrificed not getting what he or she wanted to take care of himself or herself, then you lose because your Oneself lost.

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In contrast, if Oneself "wins" and Others loses, Others will likely blame your Oneself and your Others will get discouraged about having a good relationship with the brother and even others. You lose this way also. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Either one part of you loses or the other does.

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Bottom line

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The Old Ethics of Sacrifice is a no-win ethics. To the extent that we do our best to follow its rules and guidelines, our life will occur as hard, unfair, scary, boring, meaningless, disliking ourselves, and inauthentic. But, in all its variations, we've been sticking with it since the beginning of recorded history.

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My job is to bring the New Ethics of Integrity to the world

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My job is to show people how to end those internal civil wars, to show the way to peace and joy, to be their own best friend, and to have the best possible win-win relationships with others.

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Creating Now-Next Integrity

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The New Ethics of Integrity challenges the unexamined, self-justifying assumption that Next and Now are necessary enemies. The New Ethics demonstrates again and again in every aspect of life that they can be cooperative and mutually supportive, creating bigger wins for both than when they treat each other with suspicion and resistance. It also demonstrates that any lack of integrity between Now and Next is bad for both of them.

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This is especially true with the sub-domain of Now-Next Integrity which includes choosing courage and making friends with one's fear. Fear is not the enemy. It is our Now-Next resistance to fear, which is a lack of Now-Next Integrity), that creates the problems.

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Creating Oneself-Others Integrity

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The New Ethics challenges the unexamined, self-justifying assumption that Oneself and Others are necessary enemies. It demonstrates repeatedly and cogently in every aspect of one's relationships with Others (and with others) that a cooperative, mutually supportive relationships create not only the best relationship with oneself regarding others but also the best possible, mutually selfish relationships with others.

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My destiny: I will continue to refine and bring the New Ethics of Integrity to all the people of this world.