I NO LONGER HAVE

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Problems

Dwight GoldWinde

This website is about you and for you.

But let me tell you briefly 

why I am qualified to help you.

"So easy it seems once found,

yet when unfound

most would have thought impossible.”

-John Milton

 

I consistently keep 28 promises to myself every weekday, including daily planning before 7am, exercise, and emptying my email inbox.

    But without self-discipline or perseverance.

    Earlier in my life I couldn’t even keep a promise to brush my teeth regularly.

    Are you keeping all of your promises to others and to yourself?

    Persistence

    Under promising

    NNI toolkit

 

I never procrastinate on starting something I need to start.

    But without pushing myself.

    Earlier in my life “tomorrow” was my favorite labor-saving device. I even lost a lot of money because I avoided invoicing my clients.

    Are you starting things without delay or hesitation?

    Undoing procrastination

    NNI toolkit

 

I keep working at tasks and goals tirelessly without getting frustrated. Example: I wrote and published a 700-page book taking over four years.

    But I have no patience.

    Earlier in my life I often gave up on things (like regular exercise) that I knew I should continue with.

    Are you persistent in your tasks and goals?

    Just asking the question

    Learning from nature

    Doing it with others

    NNI toolkit

I am persistent in eating super healthfully.

    But I rarely deprive myself.

    Earlier in my life I was one of McDonald’s loyal customers.

    Are you eating consistently for energy, health, and longevity?

    150 seconds to (messily) prepare a healthy, rich, filling, inexpensive meal

    Eating healthfully on $8 a day

    Step by step

    NNI toolkit

 

I quit or fail at many of the things I start.

    But without discouragement or self-criticism.

    Earlier in my life I would get discouraged if I quit or failed at something.

    Are you quitting when you need to quit and feeling great about it?

    Quitting

    NNI toolkit

Others often see me as hard-working.

    But I am not hard-working (my work is play for me).

    Earlier in my life I would have to push myself late into the night to get things done.

    Are you enjoying the processes of all that you need to do?

    Is your life a buffet?

    Lifestyle first; results second

    Next showing respect to Now

    The doer and the planner

    Sleep

    NNI toolkit

I'm always improving.

    But I am never trying to improve.

    Earlier in my life I always thought I needed to be better.

    Do you ever get tired of trying to do better?

    Unproving

    Undoing expectations

    Undoing shoulds

    NNI toolkit

 

I’m up to some important things in my life.

    But without stress.

    Earlier in my life I would feel overwhelmed by big goals and just trying to get everything done.

    Are you living without anxiety and stress?

    Under promising

    Undoing worry

    Undoing expectations

    Lifestyle first; results second

    NNI toolkit

My life has a fair amount of routine.

    But without boredom.

    Earlier in my life I was always waiting for the “boring stuff” to be over.

    Are you finding meaning in everything?

    Lifestyle first; results second

    NNI toolkit

    OOI toolkit

    Being present

    Power of Now

    Kids and cats

My life has many of the uncertainties and risks as the lives of others do.

    But I don’t worry or feel anxious.

    Earlier in my life I was a worrywart.​

    Are you worry free?

    Undoing worry

    Undoing fear

    Undoing stress

    Undoing expectations

    Undoing perfectionism

    Undoing procrastination

    Undoing shoulds

    Undoing something

    Under promising

I never feel betrayed nor taken advantage of by others.

    Because I keep good boundaries and I keep my expectations low. Therefore, I never have to forgive others (because there is nothing to forgive).

    Earlier in my life I didn’t say “no” when I needed to say “no” and I then resented others for it.

    Are you maintaining good boundaries, accepting others just as they are, and saying "no" when you need to say "no"? Are you choosing courage to undo expectations?

    Undoing guilt

    Undoing expectations

    Conditions of all great relationships

    Courage

    Undoing fear

I am quite patient with others.

    Because I never feel I am wasting my time.

    Earlier in my life I was often impatient with others because of my addiction to “being efficient” and I thought they were “boring.”

    Are you being with and listening to others with patience?

    Listening

    Listening for their listening of you

    Undoing shoulds and should nots

    Being present

    Lifestyle first; results second

    Undoing expectations

    NNI toolkit

    OOI toolkit

    

Others often see me as generous.

    Because I find ways to give to others selfishly.

    Earlier in my life I found it difficult to be generous because it seemed like self-sacrifice.

    Are you mastering the amazing dance of both giving and receiving?

    Being 100% responsible

    Partnership Conversation

    Listening

    Undoing guilt

    Undoing expectations

    Conditions of all great relationships

    Why did God put you in your body and mind

    Lifestyle first; results second

    OOI toolkit

    Now-Next integrity

    Altruistic or selfish: how to solve the conflict?

I rarely feel defensive.

    Because I know that I have nothing that needs defending.

    Earlier in my life was on guard all the time.

    Do you know that it's never about you?

    Undoing defensiveness

    Undoing guilt

    Undoing fear

    Not caring what others think?

    Listening

    Listening to others' listening of you

    Partnership Conversation

    Undoing expectations

    Undoing shoulds

I am open and self-expressed with others and I am never lonely.

    Because I’ve made friends with my fear that others may disapprove of me or reject me.

   Earlier in my life I often kept a “poker face” to try to ensure others would not think badly of me.

    Are you open and self-expressed?

    How you occur for others

    Not caring what others think?

    Partnership Conversation

    Undoing defensiveness

    Undoing seriousness

    Undoing shoulds

    Undoing fear

I am confident I can resolve almost any conflict with others.

    Because I believe that our self-interests can be complementary.

    Earlier in my life I often felt like “it’s me or them.”

    Are you looking for partnership to resolve any differences?

    Partnership Conversation

    Listening

    Listening for their listening of you

    Being 100% responsible

    Conditions of all great relationships

In each year since 2015 I have hosted about a hundred soirées in my home, with more than five hundred strangers as my guests, savoring snacks and conversation together.

    Because I know that life is my playground and everyone is my playmate or potential playmate.

    Earlier in my life I was lonely and felt disconnected from others.

    Do you have as many friends as you want or can handle?

    How others see you

    Being 100% responsible

    Listening

    Listening to their listening of you

    Partnership Conversation

    Conditions of all great relationships

My life is full and meaningful. I never ask the question, "What is the meaning of life?"

    Because only people who are not happy question the "meaning of life."

    Earlier in my life I often wondered, "What's it all for anyway?"

    Are you living as a child in this Garden of Eden?

    Kids and cats: our gigantic gurus

    NNI toolkit

    Lifestyle first; results second

    OOI toolkit

The “Dwight” I am today is unrecognizable from the “Dwight” I was before.


 

Do any of these changes interest you? If so, I will guide you to make these easy changes step by step.

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COPYRIGHT 2018-2020 BY DWIGHT GOLDWINDE