Q&A February-March, 2021
I'm so afraid of his cold response
Sally (March 26, 2021) [should I apologize to Peter? Sally in China]
Sally: Today’s 1424, I read the quote of today. It says about “ Would you prefer a guaranteed ‘no’ or a possible ‘yes’?” I was hit the right nail on the head. After I got your suggestion, I was in great anxiety. It seemed that I had really hurt Peter. The more I think that how much I might have hurt him, the less courage I have to face the apology, with the fear of no response or the unwanted response. If I don’t take the action, that’s the guaranteed “no." If I take the action, there might be possible “yes." Humm. Holy cats and jeepers creepers, I am so scared that I get no response or the cold response from Peter.
Dwight: Yes, your words and actions may have stimulated Peter to feel hurt, given how he automatically interpreted them.
Yes, you might get no response or a cold response. Of course you prefer another response.
However, however he responds means nothing about you. If you choose to do this, you are choosing courage. You are going for the possibility. And you are willing to accept the risk. Focus on feeling great about yourself for doing that, regardless of the response, which you cannot guarantee.
The events in the USA are so devastating!
Tove (February 26, 2021) [concerned in the USA]
Tove: Outside events in this country are so devastating to the USA! It is the end of a civilization that we are witnessing going down the tube led by a senile senior who takes his instructions from corrupt politicians.
Law and order gone!
Freedom of speech gone!
A police state has taken over a deeply corrupt country!
The saddest is that so many Americans believe the lies they are fed daily by CNN, MSNBC, NBC and the corrupt politicians.
I get information through outside networks from friends abroad who can still access uncensored info.
It is only my faith that brings me hope.
So sad. Doesn't it bother you too?
Dwight: If you are asking me if the increase in public divisiveness in the USA is bothering me or makes me sad, then the answer is "no."
I have some concern about it. Just like I might have some concern if a hurricane might pass near me or someone I care about. And I definitely prefer certain types of stability in the world.
But my happiness and love of everyday life is not affected by it. I may need to take some personal action to adjust here or there (as I might in preparing for some high winds that come my way). But I am always looking for the gift in that if any such actions are appropriate. Did you go through this link before: https://www.askdwighthow.org/are-you-messing-anothers-business
Tove: Your coaching advice is miraculous. Always right on.
How to even begin with the entanglement of my life!?
Garima (February 14, 2021) [lawyer, living in Kathmandu, Nepal]
Garima: My reality is bounded by obligations and responsibility. I am finding life is so hard managing people. People like my parents in one hand, in-laws in another hand, and my husband and son in another. These three groups living at three different places and I am towards my job. I am just lost within this circle. Whatever I started for my self care but couldn't continue as expected. Hard to set boundaries for personal life for myself wellbeing. How?
Dwight: Understood. Have you read this link: Are you going in the wrong direction? You have to understand and declare the new directions FIRST, before you get into the details of how to move along those directions. Then, if you have any questions about what it says or the feasibility of creating these new directions and actions in your life, let me know. Make sense?
Dwight: I'm your partner in this. Use me as needed. Okay?
Garima: Okay. I'm going through the link now.