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100% RESPONSIBLE

Reclaiming your power

Are you willing to be 100% responsible in your relationships with others?

 

The majority of us comprehend the significance of complete accountability when handling non-human entities. For example, if our computer doesn't perform as expected, we don't place the blame on it. Even if we do, we at least acknowledge the irrationality of such behavior. Instead, we either make peace with our computer's performance or continue exploring ways to modify our behavior to elicit more favorable responses from it, or even consider acquiring a new one if needed.

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Giving away our power to have the best relationships

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Conversely, when it comes to dealing with individuals, if the responses we receive are not what we expected, we usually place the blame on the other person or ourselves. We might become defensive, distance ourselves, or even perceive ourselves as the victim. These reactions tend to reduce the likelihood of eliciting the desired responses from others. Moreover, such behaviors typically result in less positive outcomes for the other people in our lives. To sum up, these tendencies can lessen our ability to form the most fulfilling relationships with others.

 

Insofar as we resort to blame, become defensive, withdraw, or perceive ourselves as victims, we are not fully embracing our responsibilities. By engaging in these counterproductive actions, we surrender a portion of our potential power to foster strong relationships and to elicit the reactions we would prefer from others.

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100% responsible does not mean omnipotence

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Accepting complete responsibility doesn't imply that we will inherently know or discover how to modify our actions to elicit a more favorable reaction from others or from reality. Thus, taking on total responsibility requires the bravery to confront life's inherent risks. It implies recognizing that we might not always get what we desire, and that there's nobody to point fingers at for this, not even ourselves. It's about accepting the reality of our circumstances, even when we might feel powerless or unable to influence them towards our desired outcomes.

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Being responsible to maintain good boundaries

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Embracing 100% responsibility implies that we have the determination to exercise courage in setting and upholding boundaries with others. This includes having the ability to assertively say "no" when necessary, enabling us to take care of both our personal well-being and the relationships we hold with others. See Saying no.

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Consider the Partnership Conversation

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Being 100% responsible also means that we consider the option of initiating a Partnership Conversation with another when a conflict or possible conflict arises.

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Is it unfair?

 

The concept of "100% responsibility" may sometimes appear to be a heavy load or even seem "unfair." Yes, it can occasionally feel overwhelming or unjust. Yet, being fully accountable doesn't restrict your ability to ask for fairness from others.

 

If you choose to sacrifice some of your capacity for cultivating optimum relationships and eliciting desired reactions from others in the quest for "fairness," that's entirely up to you. Just be aware that this choice equates to playing the victim. You are opting for less than total responsibility under the guise of "fairness."

 

Personally, I've found immense liberation in accepting complete responsibility. It effortlessly allows me to steer clear of meddling in others' affairs and focus aptly on my own, eliminating any tendency to blame others or myself. Go onto to 100% responsible (take 2).

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Related links:

100% responsible (take 2)

#1 job

How you occur for others

Is being responsible irresponsible?

Not caring what others think?

Partnership conversation

Running a water-tight ship

Undoing guilt

Undoing shoulds

Why did God put you in your body and mind?

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