Trying to fix her

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"Why don't you stop trying to fix her and just listen?" I often make this suggestion to a client who is having arguments with his girlfriend or wife. "But that's so hard," they object.

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If fact, being a good listener is much easier than trying to fix a woman's problem. I've tried it both ways. No contest. Just listening is monumentally easier and most often gets better results.

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Yes, we are habituated to doing it the hard way

 

Yes, I know it's our habit to do things the hard way. Our identity may even be attached to the idea that things have got to be hard. Where's the honor and glory and triumph if life is too easy?

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Yes, I know you will probably need to go step by step in allowing it to get easier and easier. But none of that is hard if you just accept that this is the way it is for things to get easier.

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The hard way is hard. The easy way is easy.

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And there is always an easy way to do what you're doing the hard way. Q.E.D.

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"When you fight with reality, you lose. But only 100% of the time." -Byron Katie

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