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Trash your goals
Let the good times roll
To smell the roses, get rid of those goals
Many of us are very goal-oriented or think we should be. We say to ourselves or others,
"I will finish writing my book in 40 days."
"I promise myself I will do that by the 10th."
"I will be making $6,000 per month by February 1."
"I will have a new job in six weeks."
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Getting results is important
But when we "box ourselves in" and declare that "By this date, I will have that result!" most often it severely interferes with enjoying the journey, not to speak of setting ourselves up to get sub-quality results.
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The journey is important, if not more so
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Consider the idea that it is most often a better idea to set up a “destination,” rather than a goal. A destination says,
"I will get a certain result, and I will be in consistent action to get that result, until it is achieved."
A destination does not have a deadline. A destination moves us consistently toward our outcome, while allowing the flexibility to adjust powerfully to life’s changing circumstances and to smell the roses along the way.
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You may be skeptical that it's possible to do this for some important results that we must have in our life. Check out Un-deadlining to undo that skepticism.
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Example
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For example, I could set a destination of earning $10,000 per month. To be a valid destination, however, it must also include some structures of support and some ways to enjoy the consistent actions that will move me closer to my destination until it has been attained. The focus is, more importantly, on the process, rather than the result “by a certain date.”
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Un-goaling
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Examine each of your current goals and ask yourself how to can turn them into destinations or progoals.
Choose one of these and design it as a progoal. What goals have you been avoiding, which, when re-framed as destinations, now seem like something you’d like to do and would be willing to do? Set one of these up as a destination. Notice how it may be a choice of courage to relinquish control of a goal and take a risk with the “flow” of a destination.
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"It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end."
—Ursula K. Le Guin (1929-, American writer)
"Establishing goals is all right if you don’t let them deprive you of interesting detours."
—Doug Larson
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"Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they didn’t find it,
but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it."
—Edward Postel
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