Between the devil and the deep blue sea

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I didn't like my options. Should I try to insist that Joe be more reliable in his promises to me? Should I try to find a new mechanic who would likely be more expensive and maybe not do as good a job? Or should I just suck it up and tolerate Joe's unreliability? Why did Joe have to be this way?!

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I decided to just look at the facts and let go of what I think "should be."

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• Joe was a good friend.

• Joe was a good mechanic for my car.

• Joe charged me very reasonable repair fees.

• Although Joe always returned my car later than when he said he would, it was rarely more than a week late as long as I "kept the pressure on."

• It would be problematic to find another mechanic to repair my car so well and with such reasonable fees.

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Every choice has benefits, costs, possibilities, and risks

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Certainly, it would be nice to have "everything" I wanted. But given the tradeoffs, it because obvious that I should stick with Joe and make a game out of it.

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The game

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"When will I get my car back, Joe?"

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"You'll have it on Tuesday," Joe promises.

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"Oh, that's great. It's difficult to do without my car," I reply.

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Unbeknownst to Joe, I have already made plans to get by without my car for at least a week more than what he has promised.

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Tuesday

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"Joe, where's my car?!" I ask on the telephone.

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"So sorry, so sorry...I got tied up with another emergency. I promise you'll have it by Friday, okay?"

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"Okay, I guess that will have to do," I reply with a sigh.

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Friday

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"Joe, I need my car!" I exclaim over the telephone.

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"I really feel bad, Dwight. I've been buried here. I won't do anything else until I get it finished. But I still have to ask you to wait until Tuesday. I'm really so sorry..."

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"This time is for sure, okay?!" I emphasize.

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"Okay, for sure!" Joe reassures.

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Tuesday again

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I'm delighted to have my car again. Joe proudly shows me the carburetor he overhauled that works perfectly now. He also points out a few other minor repairs he took care of that I hadn't even noticed.

 

He informs me of the charge, which as always is quite reasonable. I pay him immediately.

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"Joe, I am lucky to have you both as my friend and as a master mechanic!" 

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Joe is beaming.

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Changing the game

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I changed my should from "Joe should get my car back when he says he will" to "Joe should get my car back whenever he does," and I adjusted for that eventuality, while still doing what I could (pretending to be upset when he was "late") to get it back as soon as possible.

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Joe's over-promising habit affected everyone, not just me. His other friends continued to complain about him. Not me. I was happy with the way Joe was and we continued to have a great relationship.

 

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Ten years of trying to find my career with no success

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I knew that having a career I would love was important

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At age twelve, my uncle was a dairy farmer. I didn't like the idea of being a dairy farmer because you had to milk the cows twice a day. So I decided to be a beef cattle farmer and I joined the Future Farmers of America.

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Preacher, gadget inventor, trumpet player, medical technologist

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A young guest minister inspired me with his Sunday sermon at our local Presbyterian church in Flatrock, South Carolina. So I thought I would become a minister.

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Later Thomas Edison became my hero and I thought I could be a good gadget inventor.

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In high school, I played the trumpet in the Shelby High School marching band. I wrote a letter to The Lawrence Welk Show on TV and asked how much they paid their trumpet players. When the reply came back and their salary seemed low to me, I decided not to become a professional trumpet player.

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I met a woman who worked as a medical technologist at the Grady Memorial Hospital in Atlanta. She took me under her wing and I decided to become a medical technologist. I studied all about blood cells. My biology teacher, Mrs. James Hopper, let me teach a class about blood to my fellow biology students. I typed everyone's blood in my local Shelby, North Carolina neighborhood.

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Square dance caller, custom furniture maker, pure mathematician, philosopher, night watchman or underwater welder

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I remember practicing square dance calls while I moved the neighbors' lawns for spending money, thinking it would be a fun job with pay that wasn't too bad.

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Thinking it would be fun and creative to be a custom furniture maker, I built a custom chair for myself. I lost interest in that job after that.

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I entered North Carolina State College, majoring in mathematics, thinking I wanted to be a pure mathematician and study prime numbers.

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Once I discovered Ayn Rand, I decided to be a philosopher. To support myself before I became famous enough to get money from writing, I first planned on saving up beaucoup bucks. I thought I could save enough in two years to last me a lifetime off the interest (you could get 4% on your money in 1964) by becoming an underwater welder. I even signed up for a training course in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. At that time underwater welders were paid over $100 per hour, which equals about  $1000 per hour today in 2022 dollars.

 

Later I considered write-and-study-as-you-go by working as a night watchman.

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At 22 I quit college, no closer to finding my career

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In college, once I decided that math wasn't a career path for me, I took any course that looked interesting, hoping it might lead me to my career. No such luck. 

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Finally, after three years of college, I realized that the only reason I was staying in college was to avoid the military draft. I found a way to avoid the draft by joining the Marine Corps Reserves and I quit college.

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Here I was at 22 and, after ten years of searching, I was dead in the water with what to try next.

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If you were in my shoes, what would you have done?

Everything I had considered over the previous ten years

didn't seem important enough, 

except for maybe being a philosopher.

But where's the juice in that?

The finale coming soon: Life 168 - Season 1 Episode 7​

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