Quoting myself 71-80

How to plan your own betrayal… It's easy. Everybody does it. Just create a fantasy of how someone should behave in the future (not taking into account that such behavior cannot be predicted for certain). Then when they don't behave that way, your plan will come true and you'll get to feel betrayed.

Expecting a doctor to cure you of cancer, heart disease, stroke, or diabetes is like expecting an electronic mosquito zapper to rid your house of mosquitoes while leaving the screen door open. Shutting the screen door first before any mosquitoes got in would be like eating unprocessed vegan so that you didn't get any of these diseases to start with.

Would your school get an A? or F? Think about it. Shouldn't we evaluate our schools on how well they stimulate and nurture their students to be curious, to be creative, and to revel in the joy of learning. From my own experience with "standard" schools, all the schools would get an "F" with a few outstanding teachers getting a "C".

Since our cultures have glorified persistence and vilified desistance, we generally do an abysmal job at quitting. How many of us end jobs well? How many of us end relationships well? How many of us create great divorces? How many of us end life well? We have not learned to know when to quit and, in quitting, do a good job of it.

"Don't care what others think." Sometimes people think I say this. I never say this. This is just another idea that people use to fight with their fear of how others think or feel about them. What I do say is to use my Making-Friends-With-Your-Fear technique to create energy and confidence regarding how others may think of you. This way your fear of how others think of you will take its proper priority in your life and will be easy to address.

I have a lot of influence with a lot of people. I didn't used to. Because I didn't realize the importance of having permission to be in other people's business. Our default habit is to try to influence/control others without their permission. This only creates pushback. And, by acting without permission, we lose whatever influence we might otherwise have. Other people's business is not your business unless they give you permission to assist them with their business. Make your own life and other people's lives much simpler and happier by staying out of their business (unless you have their permission).

If you love me, that's great. If I love you, it's double great. However, it doesn't really mean much about you or me whether we love each other or not. The delightful feelings of love are just the serendipitous meshing of our mutual machineries.

The wiser I get, the more influence I have over myself and others and yet, at the same time, I learn that I have less and less power and control.

How to never be a victim? Choosing courage to set and maintain appropriate boundaries with others (where you can always feel like you're taking care of yourself) is the key to never blaming or criticizing others (and thereby making yourself a victim of them).

Life is about enjoying the game of seeing if you can get it "righter".

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If you love me, that's great. If I love you, it's double great. However, it doesn't really mean much about you or me whether we love each other or not. The delightful feelings of love are just the serendipitous meshing of our mutual machineries.

The wiser I get, the more influence I have over myself and others and yet, at the same time, I learn that I have less and less power and control.

How to never be a victim? Choosing courage to set and maintain appropriate boundaries with others (where you can always feel like you're taking care of yourself) is the key to never blaming or criticizing others (and thereby making yourself a victim of them).

Life is about enjoying the game of seeing if you can get it "righter".