"They're charging too much"

Do you continue to complain when you already have a good deal?

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"Why does she have to keep doing that?! She knows how I hate it." my client Robert complained.

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"What if your wife never stops doing that? In the big picture of everything you get to have by being with your wife, are the benefits more than the costs, including the fact that one of those costs is that she never stops doing that?" I asked.

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Robert quickly replied, "Of course."

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I responded, "There may be a way to come to an understanding with your wife where she is willing and able to change this behavior that you don't lie. However, you've already got a good deal.

"But your attitude is as if you think you've been cheated. You're not acknowledging your good deal with something like, 'Such much benefit for so little cost!' Instead, you're framing yourself as a victim of your wife for 'subjecting you to this cost' and making her the bad guy.

"If you have any interest in the possibilities of having even more benefits in comparison to the costs in your relationship with your wife, starting with being a victim and her being the bad guy is the worst place to start from."

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Do you act as if you've gotten a bad deal in your arrangements with life and others?

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When you decide that taking a risk is worth it, and then it turns out you don't get what you wanted by taking the risk, do you think you were cheated?

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