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From the Werner's Mouth
Werner Hans Erhard (born September 5, 1935) is an American author and lecturer known for founding est, which operated from 1971 to 1984 and later the Landmark Forum. Werner has written, lectured, and taught on transformation and self-improvement. Headquartered in San Francisco, Landmark currently offers over 60 programs in 21 countries (as of 2022).
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Undoing expectations: "Man keeps looking for a truth that fits his reality. Given our reality, the truth doesn't fit."
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Surrender: "Ride the horse in the direction it's going."
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Expressions of resisted fear: “The quickest way to be happy is to choose what you already have.”
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Living: “Live as if your life depends upon it.”
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Life's a game, did you forget? "In order to have a game, something has to be more important than something else. If what already is, is more important than what isn't, the game is over. So, life is a game in which what isn't, is more important than what is. Let the good times roll."
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Finished or complete: “Until you've completed your relationship with your parents, all your relationships will be about your parents.”
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Undoing expectations: “Whatever you are pushing against, you are stuck to.”
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Love: “Love is granting another the space to be the way they are and the way they are not.”
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The power of discomfort: “If it's comfort you want, life is not the place to be.”
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100% responsible: “The reaction you got was the communication you intended.”
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From choice, not reaction: “Create your future from your future, not your past.”
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Lifestyle first; results second: “Living is really pretty simple. Living happens right now; it doesn't happen back then, and it doesn't happen out there. Living is not the story of your life. Living is the process of experiencing right now.”
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Lifestyle Design Chart: “Happiness isn't at the end of the rainbow. Happiness is at the beginning of the rainbow. Following the rainbow is happiness, not getting to the end of it.”
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Choosing freely, not from reactions: “Maturity is doing whatever you want, even if your parents want the same thing.”
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Reality: “If you stand in the rain, you get wet, whether you understand water or not.”
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This is it: “If God told you exactly what it was you were to do, you would be happy doing it no matter what it was. What you're doing is what God wants you to do. Be happy.”
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Nothing to prove: “Your life and my life have turned out, and once you get that, life goes on from a position of having turned out. That's called playing the game from win.”
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Nothing to complete or catch up with: “What I recognized is that you can't put it together. It's already together, and what you have to do is experience it being together.”
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You will always be okay: “If you could really accept that you weren't ok, you could stop proving you were ok. If you could stop proving that you were ok, you could get that it was ok not to be ok. If you could get that it was ok not to be ok you could get that you were ok the way you are. You're ok, get it?”
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Life is your buffet: “Opportunity: it's not really scarce. It's everywhere. If you really were any good, you'd be overwhelmed by it.”
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This is how life works: “Life is already together, and what you have to experience is experiencing it being together. The striving to put it together is a denial of the truth that it is actually already together and further striving keeps you from getting it together.”
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You will suffer when you fight with reality: “What is is and what isn't ain't.”
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After you have enough to eat, everything else is a game: "The important question to ask is not 'Will we survive?' but 'What if we survive?'"
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The machinery of the mind: "I used to be different. Now I'm the same."
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Undoing shoulds: “In life you wind up with one of two things – the results or the reason why you don’t have the results. Results don’t have to be explained. They just are.”
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How long before you give up: "Happiness is not a disease. It does not creep up on you slowly. It is something that happens in an instant. And the truth of the matter is that you can alter your state to a state of happiness by simply choosing to be willing to have it be the way it is."
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Undoing interpretations: "You've got to get all your attitudes out of the way. And all of your leaps of faith. And all of your beliefs. And all of the things you thought were true. And all of the things that everybody knows are true. And start dealing with the basic, raw, hard, little facts."
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They are in a relationship with the wrong person when you don't respect them: "You cannot be complete in a relationship with any person whom you do not admire and respect as he or she is, and as he or she is not, rather than the way you think she is or would like her to be."
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Fundamental facts and principles: "Operating Principles for a You and Me World
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"Respect the other person's point of view, whether or not you agree with it.​
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"Recognize that if you had their history, their circumstances, and the forces that play on them, you would likely have their point of view.
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"Consider life a privilege, all of it, even the parts that are difficult or seem a waste of time.
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"Give up the islands that reinforce mediocrity, the safe places where we gossip and complain to one another, where we are petty.
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"Take a chance. Be willing to put your reputation on the line. Have something at stake.
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"Work for satisfaction, rather than for credit.
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"Keep your word. There will be times when the circumstances of life will make you forget who you are and what you're about. That is when you need to be committed to keeping your word, making what you say count."
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