Progoals

A goal without a deadline?

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“A goal without a deadline is just a dream.”
― Robert Herjavec
 

Empower your dreams with deadlines.

– H. Jackson Brown Jr.
 

If we didn’t have deadlines, we’d stagnate.

– Walt Disney

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"Deadlines have a lousy name. Call them live-lines instead. That’s what they are."

– Seth Godin
 

To understand progoals, let's first understand deadlines and regular goals

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I'm going to use the word "deadline" in a broad sense. A deadline is any intention that we have to either do something or to get some result before a certain time or date or before something else happens. Inside of this meaning, what we call a goal is a type of deadline.

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Most of us have a love/hate relationship with deadlines. We know they are necessary. We can't imagine how we would get our ass in gear without some deadlines. And it would be impossible to motivate others unless we set a deadline for them, right? Regardless, I do agree with Seth that live-lines would be a better name for them, especially if we're going to continue to use them.

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Different types of deadlines (live-lines)

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Type #1: nature gives us deadlines

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Some deadlines are imposed directly by nature.

• If you're a farmer and you don't harvest your crops when they're ready to be harvested, you'll incur a large unwanted consequence.

• If you're a hiker through the forest, then the approaching nightfall may create a deadline with unwanted consequences if you don't get your campsite set up by then.

• If you're out and about and you need to pee and if you don't find a toilet in time, you will incur some embarrassing consequences.

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Type #2: systems and mechanisms give us deadlines

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Other deadlines are imposed by others using the systems they set up and maintain or are maintained automatically.

• The schedule says the train you have a ticket for leaves at 4.35 PM. If you don't do what it takes to be on that train, then you'll incur whatever unwanted consequences there may be by not doing what it takes to be on the 4.35 PM train.

• If you don't pay off the balance on your credit card by the monthly due date, then you'll incur interest on the outstanding balance.

• If you don't pay your mortgage on time for a while, your home will be taken away from you.

• If you don't answer your phone before it stops ringing, then you will incur either the benefit or consequence of not meeting that "deadline."

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Type #3: other people give us more individualized deadlines

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• Your boss says he needs the report on his desk by Friday morning.

• Your spouse says he or she will leave without you if you're not ready to go by 8:15 AM.

• Your mother says you can watch some TV before bed if your homework is complete by 9:00 PM.

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Some of these deadlines may or may not be negotiable. Or the person setting the deadline may not impose a consequence if the deadline is not met.

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Type #4: you agree to deadlines with others

Any time-based agreement you make with others could be considered a deadline.

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• You agree to meet your friend in front of the mall at 10:30 AM. You could be incurring some unwanted consequences if you are either not on time, or late, or don't show up at all, especially if you don't communicate any of that beforehand. 

• You agree to call your friend back before dinner time.

• You agree to set a wedding date with your lover before March 1st.

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Type #5: You agree to deadlines with yourself

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• You want to lose ten pounds by October 15th...so you set up a goal (deadline) to do that.

• You create a deadline for yourself to have a minimum of $25,000 in your savings account within one year of the current date.

• You want to start a new business with the goal of $350,000 gross income by the end of next year.

• You're going to finish writing your book by May 1st of next year.

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Deadlines of this type, if not met, will incur the natural consequence of you not being able to enjoy the benefits that you would have been able to enjoy if you had met that deadline. Other consequences that are also often incurred for not meeting deadlines with yourself is that you lose confidence in yourself and you may blame yourself. If you've told others about it and they know you didn't reach it, they may also think less of you or not trust you as much.

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Deadlines are built into nature

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Although deadlines that are set by systems, others, and ourselves may not end up serving their desired or intended benefits for designated beneficiaries, all deadlines are ultimately sourced from nature. They are a built into the process of life itself. We humans are the only form of life that can consciously distinguish, create, and respond to deadlines as deadlines in service to our life.

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But why do we often hate and resist deadlines, whether externally or internally imposed?

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In short, it reflects our lack of integrity, most often Now-Next Integrity, but also Oneself-Others Integrity. Our Next often doesn't know how to get what he or she wants without those deadlines to get our Now's ass in gear. It's just another one of the battle fields of the ongoing Now-Next wars, often including the Oneself-Others wars.

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Enter progoals: an important approach to better results and loving the journey

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One of the major reason that deadlines give us a problem is that we have not learned to design our life putting process first before results. We don't have the habit to look ahead and ask ourselves, "How can we set this up so that we can get the desired result(s) in plenty of time and enjoy the journey (process) too?"

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The idea of a progoal (process-goal) is a way to do that. A progoal focuses first on the importance of setting up and enjoying the process and second on getting the results.

We could also call it a "proresult" instead of a progoal.

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How to replace deadlines with progoals, thereby increasing your integrity

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Situation #1: an important deadline (live-line) that is inflexible

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For a large portion of these deadlines, looking ahead, we cannot say that they surprise us. We know they are coming, whether it be April 15th (tax filings due in the USA) or our anniversary date, which we know is important that we remember and prepare for.

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Make these deadlines progoals, with plenty of buffer built in to allow for possible breakdowns in the process toward getting the desired results. One example is to enjoy working on those taxes step by step and to get them filed early. Use the NNI toolkit if you're unsure of how you can enjoy working on your taxes. Another example is to enjoy preparing for the big anniversary date and giving your spouse a delightful surprise with no feeling of needing to rush things. You may need to use the OOI toolkit or XXI toolkit if you're unsure of how to enjoy preparing to surprise your spouse on your anniversary.

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Note: some deadlines (live-lines) may not be as inflexible or even as important as you think they are

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Many of us in our chronic, long-term lack of integrity, where both our Next and our Others have been and are dominating, have set our lives up where it seems that we have no flexibility. We have to do this. We have to do that. We don't have time to plan for buffer and enjoy the process. Our life occurs as if we're that mule that has side blinders on and can only see the options that are straight ahead. 

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In the case of the mule, the mule handler has manipulated him. In the case of yourself, you did it to yourself and you can undo it starting now.

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You can choose courage to renegotiate things. You can play with re-designing your life, as if from scratch. You can accelerate the creation and maintenance of Now-Next Integrity and Oneself-Others Integrity, making them the #1 priority of your life. You can start to see and treat your life as an amazing buffet.

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Situation #2: you've got flexibility in agreeing to and setting a deadline (live-line)

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You can set up your schedule so that you have buffer time between appointments. As a mortgage broker, you can tell your client that you can likely get the loan approved within 12 weeks, instead of telling them 8 weeks, like they would prefer to hear. You can stand your ground with your boss that you cannot see being able to guarantee the delivery on an assignment by June 4th, but you could do it by July 10th.

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Situation #3: you want to keep a hard deadline (live-line) with yourself

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As a progoal, set it up and put structures in place that will guarantee consistent, regular activity on getting the desired result by that date. Ensure you underpromise with plenty of buffer in designing and implementing that process. Plan and ensure in advance that your Now is going to look forward to those regularly scheduled activities which will move you toward the results.

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Situation #4: you've set a soft deadline (live-line) because you're not so sure what it's going to take

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You handle this like situation #3 while keeping in mind that it "would be nice" to meet your soft live-line so that you're open to discover ways more likely to ensure that.

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Situation #5: you set up a progoal without any deadline (live-line)

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This may seem crazy to your Next. That's because your Next has used deadlines all your life to try to motivate your Now. Next is skeptical that anything will get done without deadlines. However, in many cases, setting up a progoal without a deadline may make a lot of sense, even for and especially for Next. For many goals, it's hard to reasonably predict how long they may take to achieve or even that we can achieve it, even assuming we are consistent in working toward it regularly. However, we can know that either

• we will be able to achieve the results within an acceptable period of time

• or we will find out that we cannot achieve it or cannot achieve it in a way that the costs are acceptable and then we we quit, but still be happy that we went for it.

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An example

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This was what I did when I started writing my book on courage in the year 2000. I didn't know how long it would take. I even thought that I "should" set a deadline. Should I set it for one year? Two years? I wasn't sure. Finally I decided I would have no deadline. I would just keep working on it consistently and I knew it would be written and published by "whenever." See How I finished my 700-page book. In retrospect, I am so happy I didn't set and try to hold myself to a deadline or due date. I was able to love the process and ensure that the book was something I am still very proud of to this day. I did such a great job on it, which would have been difficult if not impossible to do if I had set a deadline.

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Recommending progoals

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Deadlines, as such, are often deadly. Replace deadlines with progoals. And look for opportunities to create progoals without any due dates (situation #5). Many life opportunities exist in this domain that we may miss because we're not able to know how long something might take or to even know for sure that it's possible or feasible. With progoals new life vistas can open up that were unavailable to us to use before in the world of deadlines and goals.