Our Biased Language

(what do you do when your language

has been infiltrated with thousands of saboteurs?)

A few language biases have been recognized and addressed (to some extent)

In recent years, significant progress has been made in updating both the availability and connotation of words. For example, “mailman” has been replaced with the more inclusive “letter carrier,” and the traditional wedding phrase “I now pronounce you man and wife” has evolved into “I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

Similarly, deeply offensive terms like “nigger” and “negro” have given way to “Black” and later “African American.”

Most of us view these linguistic shifts as welcome.

However, these changes barely scratch the surface. They address less than 1% of the deeply ingrained biases that language embeds in our daily lives—biases that remain unrecognized as such by most of us and that cause immense damage in how we see ourselves and others.

Four levels of locks that help ensure we remain inside the prison of the HOGAB

The four levels are:

Words and ideas that villainize concern for Oneself (being selfish)

Words and ideas that lionize concern for Others (being unselfish)

Words and ideas that lionize concern for Next (like being persistent)

Words and ideas that villainize concern for Now (like being lazy)

We'll look at them in that order.

The bias of villainizing concern for oneself and praising concern for others

To avoid going overboard with the thousands of words that villainize behavior which could be serving taking care of oneself, I'll only share 89 of those here. Everyone of these words might describe someone who was trying to take care of themselves without necessarily any desire or intent or result to harm others. In fact, I have only been able to find one word that gives has a positive connotation of the intention to take care of oneself: self-care.

Given that everyone's #1 job in the world is to take care of themselves, it's a travesty that our language makes it quite difficult to talk about that and support that because of the severe dearth of words and expressions that indicate that taking care of yourself is a good thing to do. I'll analyze just the first nine of these to illustrate how the saboteurs accomplish their nasty deeds.

Looking just at the first 9 of 89 words in this list (that could go into thousands of words) will make the point

acquisitive
1. The denotation of acquisitive is "having a strong desire to acquire and possess things, especially material wealth or property." This is a necessary trait of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "greediness or an excessive focus on material gain or personal benefit."
antisocial
1. the denotation of antisocial is "avoiding social interaction, being unwilling or unable to associate with others." This is may be occasionally a necessary trait of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "implies behaviors that are unfriendly, disruptive, or even harmful to societal norms and relationships."
arrogant
1. the denotation of arrogant is "having or displaying a high sense of one's own importance or abilities." This is may be occasionally a necessary trait of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "an overconfident or dismissive attitude, making it perceived as unpleasant or condescending."
betray
1. the denotation of betray is "means to act in a way that does not meet someone's expectations of loyalty or adherence to an agreement or trust." This is may be occasionally a necessary behavior of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "feelings of disappointment, hurt, or anger due to the breach of trust."
bribe
1. the denotation of bribe is "something offered or given, often money or a gift, to someone to influence their decision or behavior in a way that benefits the person offering it." This is may be occasionally a necessary behavior of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "corruption, dishonesty, and unethical behavior, often undermining fairness or integrity."
close-fisted
1. the denotation of close-fisted is "being unwilling to spend or share money; being very frugal." This is may be occasionally a necessary behavior of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "excessive unwillingness to spend money, often associated with selfishness or greed."
cold-hearted
1. the denotation of cold-hearted is "refers to someone who lacks sympathy, compassion, or emotional warmth." This is may be occasionally a necessary behavior of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "suggests cruelty, indifference, or emotional detachment, often portraying a person as unkind or uncaring."
complainer
1. the denotation of cold-hearted is "refers to someone who frequently expresses dissatisfaction or grievances." This is may be occasionally a necessary behavior of anyone who is doing their #1 job.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "a person habitually finds fault or is overly negative, often implying a lack of resilience or appreciation."
corrupt
1. the denotation when applied to people or systems, it means "not adhering to established rules, standards, or procedures." This can often be necessary when following those those rules, standards, or procedures would significantly interfere with taking care of yourself or those you care about.
2. Yet this word is saddled with the negative connotation of "dishonesty, unethical behavior, or the abuse of power for personal benefit."
cruel
deserter
discourteous
dishonest
disloyal
disobedient
disrespectful
egotistical
exploitive
gold digger
grasping
greedy
guiltless
hard-hearted
impatient
inappropriate
inattentive
inconsiderate
indecent
inhospitable
inhumane
injudicious
insensitive
looking out for number one
malicious
mean
mercenary
miserly
narcissistic
naughty
neglectful
not giving back
not pulling their weight
on the make
opportunist
parsimonious
penny-pincher
pervert
polluter
possessive
power grabbing
predatory
price gouger
psychopathic
rapacious
scrooge
self-absorbed
self-centered
self-important
self-indulgent
self-interested
self-involved
self-loving
self-seeking
self-serving
selfish
shirker
silly
skirt-chaser
stingy
strange
taker
takes advantage of others
tax cheater
thoughtless
tightfisted
traitorous
uncharitable
uncivilized
uncooperative
undeserving
unfair
unfaithful
unfeeling
unfriendly
ungenerous
ungiving
unpatriotic
wasteful
weird

The flip side is even worse

Many of us may recognize the criticism inside these words and be able to qualify how we hear them for their biases and mitigate the damage caused by accepting internalizing that criticism.

However, consider the nice sounding words (antonyms—their partners in crime—for the first nine words above) like:

generous
friendly
open-minded
loyal
law-abiding
giving
warm-hearted
composed
upright.

All these traits are different expressions of being a good person and how to prioritize "looking good to others."

All these biased words create a world map inside our head so that our identity gets attached to various expressions of these. For example, if we identify think of ourselves as a "generous" person, then we will have a very hard time doing anything that might not look like generosity. Or, if we do, then we'll feel guilty about it.

The intricate web of our prison

Thousands of words, all acting in concert together in their biased portrayal of the world, are part of the infrastructure that keeps us imprisoned and disempowered. The most fundamental reason they are so effective is that we don't recognize that they are saboteurs.

The prison walls are much stronger and more extensive than we have already discovered

Our language not only biases others over ourselves, it also biases focusing of the future over enjoying now. Even if you manage to step outside of the Oneself/Others bias, the bias that favors the future over now (the Now/Next bias) could sabotage your life.

The bias of lionizing taking care of the future often with the cost of not enjoying now and the journey

In contrast to focusing on how our language villainizes taking care of oneself, let focus on how our language lionizes taking care of our future, often at the expense of sacrificing now and the incalculable damage that causes.

So, again, to avoid going overboard with a list of thousands of words that lionize behavior focusing on taking care of the future most often at the expense of sacrificing enjoying and being comfortable now, I'll only share only 89 of those here. Everyone of these words could describe someone who was was prioritizing the future at the expense of now.

Given that the purpose of life is to be happy and an essential feature of having a happy life is to be enjoy and be happy in the now and in the process of life, it's a travesty that our language makes it quite difficult to talk about that and support that because of the severe dearth of words and expressions that indicate that taking care of now is a good thing to do, especially if we think it will damage the future. Here a 89 words that lionize behaviors and actions that focus on taking care of the future with the implication that doing otherwise will mean you are not a good person and you are messing up your future.

Instead of extrapolating on just the ones at the beginning of the list as I did before, I'm going to focus in on nine more commonly used words that praise ourselves or others who are obviously "doing the right thing."

Abstemious
Accomplished
Adamant
Adept
Ambitious
Aspiring
Assiduous
Astute
Attentive
Austere
Calculated
Capable
Competent
Composed
Conscientious
Consistent
Constructive
Deliberate
Diligent
Discerning
Disciplined
Dogged
Driven
Eager
Earnest
Economical
Effective
1. The denotation of effective is "producing a result or achieving a desired outcome."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation of "competence, success, and usefulness in accomplishing goals." However, being able to easily let go of any idea of being effective will often be essential in order to fulfill on enjoying now and the process of whatever we are doing.
Efficacious
Efficient
1. The denotation of efficient is "achieving a result while using the least amount of resources, such as time, effort, or materials."
2. The word has a strong positive connotation of "capability, organization, and minimal waste." However, being able to easily let go of any idea of being efficient will often be essential in order to fulfill on enjoying now and the process of whatever we are doing.
Enduring
Enterprising
Farsighted
Focused
Forward-thinking
Frugal
Goal-oriented
Hardworking
1. The denotation of hardworking is "consistently applying effort and time to tasks or responsibilities, often over an extended period."
2. The word has a strong positive connotation of "diligence, commitment, and persistence, and is generally used to praise someone's work ethic." However, if you're trying to look good or prove that you're hardworking, that is going to create a major roadblock in being able to to fulfill on enjoying now and loving the process of the living your life.
Impeccable
1. The denotation of impeccable is "being free from any errors or flaws."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "something is exceptionally high in quality, perfect, or admirable." A person who applied the idea of impeccability to every task would be a rigid and inflexible person. They would be incapable of following a guideline like doing "something good enough," a very valuable guideline for most of the tasks that we engage in.
Indefatigable
Independent
Industrious
Intent
Judicious
Keen
Level-headed
Masterful
Measured
Methodical
Meticulous
Motivated
Organized
Parsimonious
Patient
1. The denotation of a patient is someone "able to wait for something or continue in a situation without immediate results, interruption, or change in behavior."
2. The word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "qualities like calmness, steadiness, emotional control, and the ability to endure difficulty or delay without complaint." However, if you're trying to look good or prove that you're a person who is patient, then that could create significant problems in making choices that support a life of fun and ease.
Perseverant
Persistent
1. The denotation of a persistent person is someone who "continues steadily in an activity or effort over time, even when it is not quickly successful or easy."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "determination, resilience, commitment, and the ability to overcome challenges without giving up." The problem with treating persistence like a virtue is that we will be blind to the fact that sometime, or even often, giving up or quitting is the wise thing to do and something even to be celebrated.
Practical
Preparatory
Proactive
Productive
1. The denotation of a productive person is someone who has the "ability to generate, create, or produce a significant amount of output, results, or work within a given period."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "efficiency, usefulness, and effective effort. It implies someone or something is accomplishing a lot in a beneficial way." To the extent that our identity is attached to being a "productive person", we will find ourselves limited in our ability to allow ourselves to enjoy many other amazing ways to express ourselves in life if any of those others ways don't occur to us as "being productive."
Proficient
Provident
Prudent
Punctual
Purposeful
Relentless
Reliable
Resilient
Resolved
Resourceful
Restrained
Rigorous
Self-controlled
Self-disciplined
1. The denotation of a self-disciplined person is someone who has the "ability to regulate one's own behavior, actions, or impulses without external enforcement."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "qualities such as responsibility, reliability, and strong personal control, often associated with maturity and success." If someone prides themselves on having self-discipline, they've set themselves up for a hard life. They will tend to disvalue the importance of enjoying life now and taking pleasure in the process of the journey. They might even think of themselves or others as wimps if not willing to go through the process of grinning-and-bearing-it.
Self-reliant
Serious
Single-minded
Sparing
Steadfast
Steady
Strategic
Systematic
Tenacious
Thorough
Thrifty
1. The denotation of a thrifty person is someone who "uses resources carefully and sparingly, especially money or material goods."
2. This word has a strong positive connotation suggesting "prudence, responsibility, and good judgment in managing resources." A person who identifies strongly with the idea of being thrifty, if they don't find themselves being pennywise and pound foolish without knowing it, but even worse they are unlikely to have the ability to take risks with large expenditures that could make a huge difference in their lives in terms of experiences or deep learnings and other often amazing values that they could not have gotten.
Tireless
Unrelenting
Unwavering
Unyielding
Visionary

The flip side of these nine words helps ensure you don't forget what's "right and wrong"

Just as the nine "virtues" above pull us into the world of sacrificing the now in favor on the future, their antonyms (the "vices") push us from behind. It's not good to be inefficient, lazy, unproductive, and wasteful!

Ineffective
Inefficient
Lazy
Imperfect
Impatient
Inconsistent
Unproductive
Undisciplined
Wasteful

All these traits are different expressions of what we need to not be in order to "look good to others."

How to recognize and neutralize the effects of the thousands of saboteurs in our language

Visit these suites to further your awareness and empowerment as you continue to make use of the language (instead of it just using you) that all of us rely on to communicate both with others and with ourselves.

Word Repair Shop

Toxic Words: Freshen Up Your Mouth

Cognitive Biases: Less Wrong

Undoing Shoulds: Fuzzy Words

The Gatekeeper

The saboteurs have infiltrated every language

I asked Aiko (my name for ChatGPT) the following question. She seems to have provided a rather comprehensive answer.

"Aiko, the English language contains a large number of words that praise concern for others and future-oriented behavior, while criticizing selfishness and short-term indulgence. I suspect this moral bias in vocabulary exists in most languages—and perhaps even more strongly in some, like Japanese, which seems especially inclined to glorify self-restraint and social duty.

"Is there any linguistic or cross-cultural research that confirms this pattern? Have any studies analyzed how moral values—like altruism versus selfishness or delayed gratification versus present-focused pleasure—are reflected in the evaluative vocabulary of different languages?"

Your observation is insightful and aligns with several cross-cultural and linguistic studies in moral psychology, sociolinguistics, and cultural anthropology. Let’s break down your suspicion and examine what is known, what’s likely, and what remains uncertain—particularly focusing on:

The prevalence of moral praise for selflessness and future-oriented behavior
Cross-linguistic and cultural comparisons
The case of Japanese language and culture
What data exists—and what’s lacking

1. Moral Vocabulary Favors Selflessness and Future-Thinking

Languages, especially those shaped within agricultural, religious, or communal societies, tend to favor:

Altruism over selfishness (words like generous, kind, compassionate are positive; selfish, egotistical, greedy are negative)
Delayed gratification over hedonism (words like responsible, disciplined, prudent are positive; reckless, lazy, indulgent are negative)

This linguistic tendency reflects a norm-reinforcing function of language—language encodes social values, and societies tend to praise behaviors that preserve stability, future wellbeing, and social cohesion.

2. Cross-Cultural Linguistic Patterns

Several studies (especially those from moral psychology and corpus linguistics) suggest this pattern is broadly true across cultures:

Moral Foundations Theory (Haidt et al.): Across cultures, “care/harm” and “fairness/cheating” foundations are universally recognized, and languages reflect this in their evaluative terms.
Linguistic Relativity & Moral Vocabulary: Researchers like Cliff Goddard and Anna Wierzbicka (in NSM – Natural Semantic Metalanguage theory) show that core moral terms (like “good”, “bad”, “should”, “help”, “hurt”, etc.) exist in every language and generally favor pro-social, self-restraining, and future-oriented behavior.
Corpus Analysis of Moral Language: In large corpora (e.g., COCA, Google Ngram), frequency of moral terms leans heavily toward praising social responsibility and criticizing self-centered or impulsive behavior.

So yes, while degree varies, the tendency you identify seems broadly shared.

3. Japanese Language and Culture

Your hunch about Japanese being even more skewed in this direction is probably correct—but for cultural reasons as much as linguistic ones:

Japanese culture emphasizes “giri” (duty), “on” (obligation), and “enryo” (restraint/deference)—social harmony and self-suppression are considered virtues.
Vocabulary like:
- 自己犠牲 (jikogisei) – self-sacrifice
- 我慢 (gaman) – endurance, patience (enduring hardship without complaint)
- 謙遜 (kenson) – humility
- 迷惑 (meiwaku) – causing trouble to others
- All these reflect a strong moral-praising of concern for others and future consequences.
Conversely, words like:
- 自分勝手 (jibunkatte) – selfishness
- わがまま (wagamama) – self-indulgent
- 軽率 (keisotsu) – thoughtless, rash
  are heavily negative.

Japanese language, perhaps more than English, codifies social interdependence, duty, and restraint, and is strongly skewed against overt expressions of selfishness or immediate gratification.

4. What Data Is There?

There is no global quantitative linguistic database that definitively measures moral valence across all languages—but we do have:

Large corpora (e.g., Google Ngram, COCA, BNC) that allow relative frequency and connotation analysis within a language.
Moral Foundations Dictionary – a project that categorizes English moral terms and could potentially be expanded cross-linguistically.
NSM (Natural Semantic Metalanguage) cross-linguistic studies that identify universal human values expressed in language.
Psycholinguistic valence ratings: In some languages (English, Dutch, German), words have been rated for emotional valence (positive vs. negative), which can be used to infer moral connotations.

However, no comprehensive multilingual study systematically counts praise/criticism terms for selfless vs. selfish, or present-hedonistic vs. future-oriented traits across many languages.

Summary

English favors selfless/future-oriented moral vocabularySupported by data
Most languages likely show similar patternsSupported by theory and partial data
Japanese may be even more skewedSupported by cultural and linguistic analysis
Comprehensive cross-linguistic moral valence studiesLacking or partial only

Final Reflection

Your intuition aligns with cross-disciplinary insights: human language encodes shared values, and most human societies have evolved to valorize self-restraint, responsibility, and social harmony—which language reflects.

Japanese likely does emphasize these moral dimensions more explicitly than English due to its cultural norms. But a definitive global-scale analysis remains an opportunity for future research.

Similar Suite → Next Door

AskDwightHow.org 365/24/7

14m 24s

1. Moral Vocabulary Favors Selflessness and Future-Thinking

2. Cross-Cultural Linguistic Patterns

3. Japanese Language and Culture

4. What Data Is There?

Summary

Final Reflection

1. Moral Vocabulary Favors Selflessness and Future-Thinking

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2. Cross-Cultural Linguistic Patterns

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3. Japanese Language and Culture

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4. What Data Is There?

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Summary

Final Reflection

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