• AI and the coming singularity

• EMS

• GMO

• a falling out with someone

• a government law being changed or repealed

• a government law not being passed

• anti-GMO

• attracting attention

• being ostracized

• being abandoned

• being alone in the dark

• being frightened

• being in pain

• being irritable

• being molested or approached inappropriately

• being on the street

• being out of time

• being overweight (fat)

• being too thin

• corruption

• crime

• dying

• doing your taxes

• earthquakes or volcanoes

• eviction

• failing

• feeling complacent

• feeling out of control

• feeling too close to another

• finding someone to hire for a job

• finding the right life partner

• firing someone

• getting a divorce

• getting a new/right job

• getting an STD

• getting caught for something

• getting depressed

• getting hurt

• getting intimate with someone

• getting killed

• getting married

• getting old

• getting pregnant

• getting sick

• ghosts

• global warming

• going to jail

• having enough money

• having enough sex

• higher taxes

• how you look and whether you’re attractive

• hurricanes, typhoons, and tornadoes

• hurting others

• knowing what to say

• lack of sex

• life being meaningless

• life-work balance

• looking at your finances

• losing a friend

• losing your desire for things

• losing your job

• losing your self

• making new friends

• making requests

• making the best decision (indecisiveness)

• meeting your targets and goals

• money

• more government regulation

• never getting married

• not being able to be intimate with another

• not belonging

• not getting attention

• not getting pregnant

• not having enough to eat

• others controlling or trying to control you

• others getting upset with you

• others thinking you're strange

• others avoiding you or thinking badly of you

• overly sensitive women

• overpopulation

• paying the rent or mortgage

• pollution

• poverty in the world, either yours or others

• saying “no” to someone

• setting the right priorities

• sexist men

• spending too much

• strangers 

• stress

• talking with strangers (shyness)

• the pro-choice people

• the pro-life people

• the Supreme Court

• the alt-right

• the anti-EMS people

• the anti-vaxxers

• the conservatives

• the country

• the dangers of vaccination

• the economy

• the future of the world

• the liberals

• the progressives

• the threat to democracy

• the unknown

• the weather

• things will get too good and then you might lose them

• under population

• using technology

• war or WW III

• what will happen after you die

• what will happen if you don’t worry

• what you did in the past

• what you’ll regret in the future

• whether you made the right decision

• whether you’ll ever be happy

• whether you’re happy

• whether you’re with the right person

• who will take care of you when you get old

• world peace

• worrying

• what others think of you

• you or the country having to support all the old people

• your bad habits

• your business failing

• your children and whether you’re raising them right

• your debt

• your friends

• your future

• your health and your fitness

• your low energy levels

• your parents

• your pets

• the safety of your children

​

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You’re worried that...​

​

• a secret will get out

• important others will change their values or beliefs

• life has passed you by

• life or others will disappoint you

• no one will ever love you

• others are blaming you or would blame you (guilt)

• others are keeping things from you

• others don’t like you

• others don’t love you

• others don’t see you as sexy

• others only want/like you for your looks

• others only want/like you for your money

• others only want/like you for your status

• others think you’re a bad person

• others will be disrespectful to you

• others will be offended by you

• others will be rude to you

• others will bore you

• others will disappoint you (not meet your expectations)

• others will feel disrespected by you

• others will get angry with you

• others will gossip about you

• others will need you too much

• others will not think you are friendly enough

• others will think you’re not generous enough

• others will offend you

• others will think you’re a cheater

• others will think you’re a liar

• others will think you’re a loser

• others will think you’re cold-hearted

• others will think you’re foolish

• others will think you’re not doing your duty

• others will think you’re not loyal

• others will think you’re unkind or cruel

• others will treat you unfairly

• others won’t accept you the way you are

• others won’t know how much you love them

• others won’t love you the way you are

• others won’t need you

• others won’t see you as special

• others won’t tell you what they are thinking

• others won’t think you’re a good Christian, or a good Muslim, or a good Hindu, or a good Mormon

• others won’t think you’re a good Republican

• others won't think you're a good Democrat 

• others won’t think you’re a good environmentalist

• others won't think you're a good feminist

• others won’t think you’re a loyal American

• some people can’t be reasoned with

• someone is avoiding you

• someone is not loyal or won’t be loyal

• someone will betray you

• someone will disobey you

• someone will hate you

• someone will lie to you

• someone will request something of you

• someone will say “no”

• someone will sue you

• someone won’t meet your expectations

• something is taking too long (impatience)

• something will break and you’ll have to get it fixed

• something won’t go right

• sometimes you share yourself too openly

• the pain will continue

• the “rule of the majority” will destroy individual rights

• things aren’t clean enough

• what happened means something about you

• you can’t afford or don’t have insurance

• you can’t control someone

• you can’t control something

• you can’t cope with life

• you can’t trust others

• you do not have enough time to get everything done

• you don’t have a compelling future

• you don’t have a life direction

• you don’t have enough adventure in your life

• you don’t have enough intimacy in your life

• you don’t have enough saved for retirement

• you have to be happy or nice for others

• you need to be more organized

• you should be more extroverted

• you sometimes keep things too much inside

• you will need another too much

• you won’t be able to get what you want

• you won’t be able to perform sexually

• you won’t be able to persist

• you won’t be persistent

• you won’t be smart enough

• you won’t belong or fit in

• you won’t do the right thing

• you won’t feel loved by others

• you won’t find a way to solve the problem

• you won’t get fired you so you can get unemployment insurance

• you won’t get into heaven (or that you’ll go to hell)

• you won’t get your fair share of the inheritance

• you won’t live up to others’ expectations

• you won’t live up to your full potential

• you won’t pass the test

• you won’t reach your goals

• you won’t take care of yourself

• you won’t win your lawsuit

• your children won’t love you

• your company will downsize or go bankrupt

• your depression will continue

• your duties will keep you in a box

• your insurance won’t come through

• your insurance won’t cover your condition

• your reputation will take a hit

• your thinking is not independent enough

• you’ll be a burden to others

• you’ll be assaulted

• you’ll be bored

• you’ll be disowned by a family or community member

• you’ll be embarrassed

• you’ll be helpless

• you’ll be invisible to another

• you’ll be lonely

• you’ll be overwhelmed

• you’ll be pressured (or are being pressured)

• you’ll disappoint others

• you’ll disappoint yourself (not meet your own expectations)

• you’ll feel guilty

• you’ll feel shame

• you’ll forget something you should remember

• you’ll get distracted

• you’ll lose someone’s love

• you’ll lose someone’s respect or admiration

• you’ll lose your freedom

• you’ll lose your job to automation

• you’ll lose your job to foreign competition

• you’ll lose your temper

• you’ll lose something

• you’ll make a mistake

• you’ll miss alcohol if you quit

• you’ll miss smoking if you quit

• you’ll miss some drug if you quit

• you’ll miss out on something

• you’ll miss something you should have noticed

• you’ll never be the popular one

• you’ll never feel like you’re enough

• you’ll never get it all together

• you’ll procrastinate

• you’ll procrastinate more and more

• you’re get hungry on your diet

• you’re going to get fired

• you’re going to owe money on your taxes

• you’re going to put your foot in your mouth

• you’re missing something

• you’re not ambitious enough

• you’re not doing a good enough job

• you’re not doing your best

• you’re not following through on your plans

• you’re not going to die soon

• you’re not going to get enough sleep

• you’re not going to get to sleep soon

• you’re not good enough

• you’re not more self-expressed

• you’re not normal

• you’re not saving enough

• you’re not smart enough

• you’re not spontaneous enough

• you’re not structured or organized enough

• you’re not taking care of now

• you’re not taking care of the future

• you’re not being responsible

• you’re shy

• you’re spoiling your children

• you’re too easily influenced by others

• you’re too indulgent with yourself

• you’re too late to do what you wanted to do

• you’re too lazy

• you’re too selfish

• you’re too strict with your children

• you’re too stubborn

 

You get the idea.

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Unlearning the chronic habit of resisting your fear

 

The dam that holds back and fights with your fears was built over a lifetime. It’s not going to disappear overnight. In fact, it will probably never completely disappear. But by making a game of chipping away at it, step by step, day by day, your energy and confidence will increase and maintain. You’ll become more at peace with yourself and with others.

 

A unique type of dufear, because it doesn’t occur as fear, is guilt. Here’s a link especially design to show you how to disappear guilt: Undoing guilt.

To create and maintain this game I recommend targeting various different worries, that is, dufears, by using Kickstarting a mental habit along with Undoing fear.